My Thoughtful Place

A place to ponder, ruminate and meditate about family and life.

Where are We Supposed to Be?

Where are we supposed to be? This question has been haunting me for the last few days. Let me give you a little background. When our 6 year old was 9 months old, we were informed by the minister at our former church that children belonged in the nursery, not in the worship service. Now she had a lot of stranger anxiety at that point and we weren’t going to dump her in with a stranger and have her petrified for an hour. And besides, she was exceptionally good and did not cause any disturbance. But no discussion was to be had, so we left the church I been brought up in. It also meant leaving the choir and the friends that I had there.

A little less than a year after we left that church, some friends of mine from a community chorus invited me to sing with them at their church for their Christmas Cantata. We have been attending that church ever since. However, this church has been loosing a lot of people lately. For quite some time now, the families with children have slowly been leaving to go to other churches. There were only a few left this past year, and the other family with a 6 year old and 5 year old just decided this past week that they were leaving as well. This basically means that there will be no Sunday school for our children because there just aren’t enough children left to have it.

I had dinner last night with my 2 best friends from my original church. We haven’t kept in touch quite as much as we said we would because like everyone else, our lives are very busy. But last night I realized just how much I miss seeing them every week at choir and church. While I really like the people in the choir and at the church we now attend, I haven’t created any really close friendships there. And girlfriends are so important.

All of this has made me feel kind of hollow right now. I want to do what is best for my children. I know the attitudes at my former church haven’t changed much but they do have a Sunday school. I know the people at the church we now attend would be there for us if we had any need at all. I know they’re trying to improve things, but it isn’t working. I know dh has no desire at all to go back to our old church because he said he never felt completely comfortable when we were there. Our present church has no youth group, isn’t going to have a Sunday school now and doesn’t have a nursery even though they are much more “kid friendly” during worship services.  And I miss my girlfriends.

I’m feeling lost. God, where do you want us to be????


July 30, 2008 - Posted by | Children, Church, Family, Friends

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